Archive for Press Releases

A New Year’s Sunrise Proposal: “Better Than Donuts!”

(New York City) – At the dawn of their fourth year together, Micah Laaker surprised long-time girlfriend Carrie Patton with a marriage proposal. After awaking at a remarkably early hour by vacation-morning standards, Laaker and Patton proceeded to the Brooklyn Bridge in lower Manhattan to watch the sunrise. Three years earlier while chatting it up […]

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Trolls Enter Inner Sanctum of Laaker Abode

(New York City) – This story begins as many Micah Laaker stories begin, with a devious scheme to upgrade computers. It ends, though, unlike many Micah Laaker stories end: in a rowdy troll attack within Mr. Laaker’s apartment. Book One Wanting to upgrade to the latest and greatest computer on the market, Mr. Laaker took […]

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Mr. Laaker Joins Faculty at Katharine Gibbs School

(New York City) – Micah Laaker has joined the faculty of Katharine Gibbs School of New York to begin teaching this term. As a member of the college’s Graphic Communications department, Mr. Laaker will teach "Multimedia I" to returning Visual Communications students. Focusing on how the electronic medium impacts design, the course will provide students […]

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HOW Magazine Publishes Laaker SVG-As-File-Format Missive

(New York City) – In their October 2002 self-promotion annual, HOW Magazine published a new article by Micah Laaker. Entitled "One format to rule them all," the article details the benefits of using SVG (Scalable Vector Graphics) as a common file format, allowing easy file exchange, web publishing, and email distribution without any loss in […]

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Predicament of Whale Zombies “Disturbing”

(New York City) – Raising an issue sure to be debated by zombie enthusiasts worldwide, Micah Laaker pondered the sorry fate of whale zombies early this week. Recoginizing the incredible amount of tissue, bone, and cartilege that a whale zombie would have to chomp through to get to a non-zombied whale’s brain, Mr. Laaker wondered […]

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Mysterious Island Fortress Focus of New Documentary Project

(New York City) – “Hey, what’s the deal with that castle out there?” Micah Laaker asked his girlfriend on their return train trip alongside the Hudson River last fall. Against a beautiful, foggy, Fall backdrop, a crumbling tower of a forelorn castle rose out of the waters alongside the Metro North Railroad tracks near Cold […]

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Handyman Handy Only at Confusing, Spiting Others

(New York City) – There are many acceptable locations where one would place their bottle of mouthwash. Some would opt for a bathroom shelf; others, a bathroom cabinet. Generally, however, the floor behind the toilet is not one of these acceptable locations. And thus begins the anger. Many readers remember, with pain, the dreadful "special […]

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SAMS Publishing Releases “Teach Yourself SVG in 24 Hours”

(New York City) – SAMS Publishing has announced the release of Micah Laaker’s "Teach Yourself SVG in 24 Hours." This title serves as an introduction to the graphics technology in the form of 24 one-hour lessons that build a reader’s skills gradually. Targeted for designers and HTML developers, the book promises readers the ability to […]

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Dentist Gives Laaker Clean Bill of Health

(New York City) – Visiting a New York dentist for the first time, Micah Laaker was given a thumbs-up for his continued "Cavity-free" performance. Mr. Laaker, a 24-year regular of Dr. Taylor’s dental practice in Omaha, NE, was encouraged to put his dental care health insurance to the test locally after being unable to visit […]

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Fast Food Restaurant Rankings posted by Mr. Laaker

(Mountain View, CA) — In the small circle that is his family, friends, and acquaintances, Micah Laaker is known as a man who loves fast food. A person who decries Supersize Me as nothing but a farce, a snobbish, poorly-executed whiner’s unscientific smear campaign just to look good to his vegan girlfriend. A person who […]

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Tolkien Flick Whips Up Veritable Nerd Frenzy

(New York City) – Emboldened by a $130 million commitment from New Line Cinema, J.R.R. Tolkien aficionados are feeling a level of acceptance formerly unheard of for their nerd mania. While Micah Laaker’s inclusion in this following is known to many, his ardent participation in discussing the history of Middle-Earth (the world in which Tolkien’s […]

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SVG Book On Sale Before Release

(New York City) – Micah Laaker today announced the ability to pre-order "Teach Yourself Scalable Vector Graphics in 24 Hours." The book, Mr. Laaker’s first foray into the world of book publishing, is set to be released in late January 2001, but many online resellers are now accepting advance orders. The tome can be purchased […]

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MF Doom Flash Video Gains Press Coverage in Design Community

(New York City) – To familiarize designers with the ease of converting video into animation, HOWdesign.com published Micah Laaker’s "Simplifying Flash Video." Covering the gamut of the entire process, the article clearly outlines the steps necessary to achieve the video’s visual effects. Laaker.com readers will likely be familiar with Mr. Laaker’s MF Doom video, which […]

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Rollout of New Broadband ‘Laaker.com Knowledge Network’ Initiative Announced

(New York City) – Continuing efforts to breathe life into its struggling online consumer site, Laaker.com announced its foray into broadband delivery: email-based newsletters. "Our readers have been clamouring for a less confrontational way of hearing about new Laaker.com content than me berating them for not checking the site everyday," said Micah Laaker. "The ‘Laaker.com […]

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An Open Letter to the Nabisco Corporation

(New York City) – After laying off nearly the entire staff two weeks ago, Micah Laaker conceived the idea of corporate sponsorship for the ailing Laaker.com. Having recently seen About.com‘s shameless brand bastardization (by replacing the "O" in "About" with a green, roatating Lifesaver candy), Mr. Laaker wrote to see if the same deal was […]

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