(Kansas City, MO) Defying conventional wisdom, Micah Laaker indeed had his hair cut, as per his predictions upon changing his "mug." (See press release 12/13/98.)
Quick to prove pundits and naysayers wrong, Mr. Laaker was reported to have had his hair trimmed last night. The exact time and location of the haircut was unknown at the [...]

(Kansas City, MO & Nagano Prefecture, Japan) Inspired by past trips to Disney’s "It’s a Small World" amusement ride, Micah Laaker today announced his first overseas publishing efforts.
Commissioned by overseas correspondent Kathy "Chatterbox" Wearne to create an illustration depicting her, Mr. Laaker slowly sprung to action, finally delivering said illustration months after the initial request. [...]

(Kansas City, MO) Enduring countless taunts and much recent humiliation, Micah Laaker today announced a “new” him, with a fresh new “mug.” This “mug” became manifest with his new spectacles and clean cut appearance.
Mr. Laaker was quoted as saying the changes “may not end there.” There are rumors of impending haircuts and possible amusing quips. [...]